After reading these words, Joanna looked at the King sadly. The rooms of her house in the Kingdom were empty. In the bad days before she had boundaries, her treasures were often taken from her. The people who were nearest to her hated her treasures.
They had wanted her compliance, her going along with something, her helpfulness, her skills, her work, her possessions, more than they had wanted her to be real.
Other people made demands she would be paralysed to say no to, because her conscience blocked her from refusing them.
“The heart is deceitful above all things, and beyond cure,” she read; “Who can understand it?” Jeremiah 17:9
This was the human heart. Deceitful. Incurable. Unable to be understood. How could she fix what she could not grasp? She fought a brief feeling of hopelessness, until she remembered the words of the King;
“But I, the LORD, search all hearts and examine secret motives”. Jeremiah 17:10.
It brought to mind the words of Anna, her Great-Great Grandmother who wrote, “the Lord sees into your heart.”
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. Psalm 139:23-24
“Father, I have a problem. I cannot rely on my own conscience. Conscience; meaning moral sense, principles, scruples, still small voice. It has loaded me down with all sorts of guilt, failed to protect me, and made me responsible for other people’s rubbish.
Now I am building boundaries to keep the bad out, but whenever I build a boundary I experience a feeling of guilt. Where was this coming from? I cannot rely on myself! Granted, with your teaching and influence I am getting better. You never speak to me the way I speak to myself. Help me to guard my heart, and to stand.”
The King heard her prayer, and joined Joanna next to the wall He helped her build. She was making progress.
He said “This wall is to protect the treasures that lie within.”
“What are these treasures that you speak of, Lord?” she asked.
“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Luke 12:34
“Basically there are three treasures; three parts of the heart, the soul,” the King replied;
“The first treasure is your feelings; your emotions which serve as barometers of the Soul. They function as a signal. People who don’t take ownership of their feelings, whose feelings have been violated, lose their sense of self protection. Ask yourself, do I own my feelings, or do I let other people own my feelings? Your feelings are our own.
The second treasure is your attitudes; convictions, what you believe, what is real to you and what isn’t, your doctrinal beliefs, what you think is true about life. You have to stand for what you believe. You always used to always question if you were right or not” the King stated. She nodded. He was right. “People without good boundaries around their attitudes do that.”
“The third treasure is your behaviour. You went through life feeling like someone else was making you do something, because they had some sort of hold over you. Is that not true?”
“Many people feel like that. People that always feel controlled by the outside ‘they made me do it’, tend to be people who don’t set good limits, or haven’t been able to set good limits on other behaviour,” the King explained.
“For all must appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each person may receive what is due for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad.” 2 Corinthians 5:10
“You are going to be called to account at the Judgement for the Believer and your behaviour will be evaluated. You won’t be able to accord it to anyone else, you will have to say that you stood alone and you made the decisions.”
She nodded, understanding the King was the Judge. “For the Father judges no one, but has committed all judgment to the Son, that all should honour the Son just as they honour the Father. He who does not honour the Son does not honour the Father who sent Him.” John 5:22
Bowing before the King, she asked “For where my heart is, my treasure is. Please take up the throne in my Kingdom. Help me to enforce my boundaries so that no one can make me do anything! I want to be able to own my feelings and trust my decisions. Teach me to guard my heart so that I can keep the treasures safe.”
Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Proverbs 4:23